Here in the South, the topic of when to say when is not something that one has to consider. My favorite quote is from Dorothy Parker: “I like to have a martini, two at the very most. After three, I’m under the table. After four, I’m under my host.”
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But if someone has had too much to drink, I usually offer to help them get home and call them a car. They usually don’t realize I’m also pushing them out the door. I once had a guest who had too much to drink. He said goodbye, and I thought he had left. The next morning, the butler discovered him passed out on the dog bed!
I know exactly how much alcohol I can have before I am not presenting myself well. I like people having fun, but slurring? You are not coming back, if you’re a slurrer. At a certain age, too, you just can’t do that anymore. The drug thing is not my thing, so I don’t get the mushroom party thing.
I’m amazed at how, when I was using a lot of drugs and drinking a lot, how I really believed that everybody was doing it. And once I stopped, I was like, No, I was kind of the only one.
I personally think saying goodbye is important. Especially to the host. But if you can’t find them, or if slipping out the door is the only way to get out, then a text saying goodbye should do. No matter what, I always send a text thanking the host and saying how nice the evening was. That goes a long, long way.
I’m the biggest believer in Irish exits. I think that if you tell people you are leaving, it’s kind of disappointing, so why would you tell them? It raises this whole point of “You’re leaving?” And it pauses the whole vibe.
One of the most fabulous things that my husband and I have experienced is, we were at dinner with Bette Midler, and she insists on doing the dishes, wherever she is, at her house, or at somebody else’s house. “I’m doing the dishes!” She needs to do the dishes. That’s probably one of the reasons she’s so successful — she knows she could do dishes, if she had to.
This is a huge new thing in New York, where people no longer thank. I’m old enough and spoiled enough that, if I make an effort to give a dinner party and invite you, I hope you will acknowledge it. It’s just old-fashioned manners. When you’re invited, and you accept, you thank.
If you had a good time, even if it’s a week later, call and say, “Just thinking of you today, thank you again for a beautiful evening.” Or put that on a card with a stamp and throw it in the mail. It’s lovely to get something like that. Handwritten cards are wonderful.
We’re not in the handwritten note days anymore, but send something afterward, a thank-you note, a follow-up. And don’t use the word “can’t,” as in, “I can’t wait to see you again.” No! Make it: “I look forward to seeing you again.” Something that evokes that positive energy into the next step.
As the hostess, I expect everyone to leave at the designated time. If they don’t, I have several foolproof ways of dealing with stragglers. First, I turn off the music. Then I walk around with a candle snuffer in hand, gradually extinguishing the candles. Finally, I start picking up the glasses, even the ones people are still drinking from.
Once the room is dark and the alcohol has stopped flowing, most guests get the message. But there’s always someone who foolishly believes you want the party to go on all night. That’s when I say, “Do you need me to call you a car?”
Hosting your first dinner party is an exciting undertaking, filled with the thrill of planning and the anticipation of bringing your loved ones together. From designing dinner party invitations to curating a specific menu, creating a welcoming environment, and timing it all just right—there’s a lot to plan. But fear not! We’ve compiled a list of tips for hosting a dinner party that will make your first one a breeze.
We love cultural themes like an Italian feast or a French fête, cuisine favorites like a seafood boil or fondue party, and fun options like a casual game night or a garden party. If you want to get into the spirit of your theme, ask your guests to come dressed accordingly.
Part of the fun of planning a dinner party is the opportunity to introduce new people to each other. You likely have friends from everywhere—work, childhood, and mutual friends. Consider inviting a carefully curated group that you think will have common interests and enjoy each other’s company. Thoughtful planning helps ensure a lively, enjoyable evening where everyone feels comfortable and connected. After all, the more, the merrier!
Sending dinner party invitations well in advance gives everyone time to make arrangements and ensure they can attend. It also gives you plenty of time to prep and plan, so things are just the way you want them. You’ll be able to comfortably confirm RSVPs, adjust the menu accordingly, and order any ingredients, supplies, or décor. An early invitation builds anticipation and excitement for the evening, making your dinner party feel special right from the start.
Hosting a successful dinner party requires planning for dietary requirements and restrictions to ensure that every guest feels cared for and included. Paperless Post makes it easy! Instead of texting guests individually, you can enable Guest Questions when you create your invitation, allowing you to ask about dietary restrictions directly. This way, you’ll collect all pertinent information upfront, giving you time to plan your menu and accommodate allergies, vegetarian preferences, or other restrictions.
Let the fun begin! Planning a menu is your chance to get creative. If you’re confident in the kitchen, showcase your skills with dishes you’ve had bookmarked for months, or try Food & Wine’s flavor-packed paella, salmon with sour cream and onion hasselback potatoes from Bon Appétit, or a vibrant pita and kebab board by Camille Styles.
If you prefer to play it safe, stick to dishes you know well—especially ones guaranteed to be crowd-pleasers. You could do make-your-own pizzas for a communal experience, put together some grilled chicken street tacos with all the toppings (both from Delish), or prepare a casual but classic Caesar salad from Bon Appétit and a side of crispy, salty fries. Remember, the goal is to enjoy the evening with your guests, so choose a menu that lets you feel relaxed and present at your party.
Male Stripper ScottsdaleSince you’re providing the main meal, asking a guest (or two) to bring a little sweet treat is perfectly fine. Guests can bring pies, cookies, ice cream, cheesecake, cupcakes, or anything else they love baking. By outsourcing dessert, you’ll save time and give your guests an opportunity to get in on the fun.
Organization and efficiency are the keys to minimizing stress on the day of your dinner party. Start by creating a detailed shopping list that includes all the ingredients you’ll need, plus extras like drinks, appetizers, and décor. Give yourself time to hit your favorite grocery stores so you’re not rushing to find that critical ingredient at the last minute.
If you’re hosting a more formal dinner, splurging on quality stemware can be a worthwhile investment. Elegant wine glasses don’t just add a lovely detail; they’ll elevate the entire experience for your guests. Consider them a gift to your future self—one that celebrates the success of your first dinner party and sets the tone for many more memorable evenings to come!
There’s nothing quite like a good bottle of wine, and ordering your favorite by the case is a smart way to save money while ensuring you’ll have plenty on hand for dinner. A nice glass of wine can help people relax and get the conversation flowing. However, if wine isn’t everyone’s preference, consider offering beer, a refreshing spritz, or non-alcoholic mocktails as well to accommodate a variety of tastes.
With a little inspiration and some light prep work, guests can enjoy a perfectly crafted cocktail—while you enjoy the evening. Mix up a signature drink ahead of time using simple pitcher cocktail recipes from Olive, or try a crowd-pleasing spiked punch bowl by Redbook. Add garnishes like fresh herbs or citrus slices so guests can serve themselves and customize their drinks just the way they like. Cheers to that!
Cheese can be filling and expensive when feeding a crowd. While it’s often the go-to appetizer for dinner parties, it’s wise to round out your suite of options. This way, your guests can enjoy a few bites and still have plenty of room for dinner. Consider light, flavorful snacks like olives, spiced nuts, pickled vegetables, or veggies and hummus. If you’re working with a theme, keep the apps coordinated for a cohesive menu.
Put a twist on tradition and use herbs to spruce up your décor. Display fresh herbs in glass vessels, scatter them artfully across the table, or place them in mini herb pots for a rustic touch—and a charming take-home gift for your guests. And as a bonus, many herbs smell lovely. For an extra pop of color, arrange citrus fruits in decorative bowls to bring vibrancy to your table.
Candles are a simple yet elegant way to make your first dinner party feel special, instantly creating a warm and inviting ambiance. Beautiful, tapered candles and elegant candle holders look lovely on any dinner table. If you prefer a more minimalist look, opt for thick pillar candles that stand out on their own, or try colorful, mismatched candles for a fun way to add whimsical flair. Candles are versatile, so pick your favorites and let their soft glow add magic to the evening.
Simple table settings are a smart way to reduce stress and create a beautiful atmosphere. Start with a clean, neutral color scheme and DIY it by purchasing fabric to make your own tablecloth or runner. Choose a fabric that’s 24” wider and 24” longer than your table so the cut edge doesn’t show, or if you opt to make a table runner, fold it thin and iron the seams beneath it on either side so that it lays flat.
Use basic but classic dinnerware and place settings, and consider adding inexpensive, festive dish towels or fun paper napkins. Don’t overthink glassware—water glasses and wine glasses are all you need. Finish your table setting with place cards or let guests seat themselves. And just like that, it’s time to party!
After all the careful planning—sending invitations, selecting your menu, and arranging the décor—it’s time to relax, have fun, and savor the feeling of hosting your first dinner party. Be present, soak in the atmosphere you’ve created, and enjoy the company of your guests. Remember, the true magic of a dinner party lies in the laughter, conversations, and shared moments. You’ve earned the fun, and then some!
Whether you’re preparing for a birthday dinner party or a Christmas dinner, learning how to plan a dinner party is an exciting adventure. By implementing a few clever tips and tricks, your guests will never guess it’s your first time.
With Paperless Post, choose from a variety of elegant dinner party invitations for every theme that will get your guests excited for your gathering. Customize your invitation to your liking, track RSVPs, and set yourself up for a night to remember.
Do you love surprises, or do they make you uncomfortable, like receiving roses on special occasions? Regardless of how you feel about them, surprises play a significant role in relationships and important milestones. They are genuine ways to show love and appreciation, creating memorable moments and strengthening bonds.
Anthropologist Paul Ekman identified surprise as one of the six basic human emotions. He explains that surprise is a brief but intense reaction, characterized by a sudden psychological startle in response to something unexpected. Moreover, research predicts that the human brain finds unexpected pleasures more rewarding than anticipated ones.
Whether it’s a surprise birthday party, an unexpected visit, or a spontaneous gift, these moments of genuine emotion significantly enhance your relationships and enrich your lives. This detailed guide will walk you through each step to ensure your surprise birthday party is a spectacular success.
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